Hey girl, hey! Is your ex renting space in your head and you feel like you can’t seem to stop thinking about him? If so, you need to evict him immediately! Are you one of those beauties who doesn’t like to let go and hold on for dear life? Do you have a situation where your ex seems to still live in your heart just a little and is on your mind constantly, and you want to get rid of him for good? Then luv, this is the blog post for you. I went through this, and I know how hard it is at times to get ole’ boy out of your head. I don’t want you to be at the gym blasting Demi Lovato, Sorry, Not Sorry daydreaming about showing him how bomb you are by making him jealous, yeah no. That’s not going to help you, boo. It will do the opposite by keeping your ass stuck. Demi is telling you to move on, and he will be sorry, but don’t obsess over it. You deserve better than that.
Do you want to hear some serious numbers on the matter? At my previous media company, we had a focus group of men and asked them their habits after a breakup. It was 12 men on the panel, and 11 of the men stated that they keep busy and don’t really think of their exes because as one confident guy said, “we have better things to do.” I tell ya, the woman standing behind the see-through glass mirror undetected were on fire! So, ladies forget these guys they aren’t thinking about you and do you. Want to clear your mind and move forward? Read on below to get your life back.
- Truly Loving Yourself and Owning Your Happiness
This is the most important step, and that’s why it’s listed first. See, a lot of women need to be healed within. One way to do that is to learn to love yourself or love yourself again. Usually, when you have obsessive thoughts where you can’t get your ex-husband or ex-boyfriend out of your head is because you aren’t happy with yourself. You haven’t figured out that you and your creator are the source of your own love, not your ex. You also may be thinking negatively about yourself and possibly thinking your ex is doing better off without you. You may have a perception that he is living a more abundant life than you and that you may have missed out -Girl no. When I experienced this issue, I had to quickly realize that I was looking at funhouse carnival mirrors, which are distorted. Love, you were put on this earth with a purpose your breakup doesn’t mean that your life is over. You must learn how to be happy with who you are as a person and love your life. Make your life lit! Click here to learn how: practice total self-care, hit the gym (even harder) meditate, and do things that you love and you enjoy in your beautiful life WITHOUT him.
- Face the reality of your failed relationship. Stop looking at the good and remember ALL of the Bad about Him
Realize the truth of who he is and stop dreaming about the lies and the false propaganda.
Girls, most times when we are stuck on our ex boos it’s because we aren’t looking at how this guy was a total jerk or how he simply wasn’t for us. We tend to look at the good we saw in them (which obviously wasn’t a factor if you broke up, whether you broke up with him or if you were dumped, either way, he wasn’t authentically a good person!)
Here’s a gem: a friend of mine told me that her therapist said to her that the following was significant to get over your ex and stop thinking about them. Women tend to want to remember the good times, like him cooking for you, his bomb foot massages; his bomb sex, or how funny he was. No! Don’t think about those things think about what caused the demise of your relationship. Think about his part in the breakup. What were his bad traits? Why did you guys break up? If you can’t recall so quickly look below for some help to get you out of your slump!
- Was he emotionally unavailable?
- Did he move on with someone else?
- Was he abusive or disrespectful?
- Did he cheat? (once or multiple times) and claimed he would stop?
- Did he so call fall out of love? (they love to say this ish)
Whatever it is, you know the truth, and you need to focus on that and not the good things about you so you can realize how he wasn’t right for you in the first place so you can learn in your heart and your mind that you need to move on and be healed and happy.
- Level up: Get Busy with Your Career/Business and make Power Moves!
Alright, girlfriend, this is where you get your ish together and show yourself that you are right and you are the one better off without him. You may have your day job or are working on your career and if so good for you! I say this because many of us don’t know what we want to do in our lives and we wonder and take random jobs to make money to survive. However, if you’re going to get over your ex now is an excellent time to step your career game up. You aren’t in a relationship balancing your time, and you can do more things. So, why not throw yourself in your newfound career and business and be proud of something level up! Check out this link on how to do so, LEVEL UP. They say time flies when you are having fun, which is true. Do something you love, and something you have always wanted to do and say now is the time! When you are busy doing you-there isn’t any time to think about your ex. Girl, you are too busy learning your business, taking meetings, and being great than thinking about someone who isn’t worthy anymore. Get your life, girl!
God did not create you to wallow around, hanging on to the past. Stop focusing on him and hos seemingly perfect life. Remember that what you may be thinking about him and his current life is you looking from the outside in which isn’t always as it seems. You don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors. Trust and believe people’s ways don’t change just like that and that person that is with him now is dealing with the same bulls*&#@ you had to deal with, but the beautiful part about it is that he is HER problem now. There is something much better for you coming up when the time is ready. Become emotionally healthy and have a stronger mindset that you are great right now without him and you will be able to move mountains and get rid of the clutter in your head which in turn can help you bet best you can be for your next relationship so you will be #winning.